hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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