NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize
