she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
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