it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
