It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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