Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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