i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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