So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
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