He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
