I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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