something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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