How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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