Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
