What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
And then my night got REAL pukey
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
