redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
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