she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
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