Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
