dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Banned from zoo.
Again?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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