He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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