Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Randomize
