hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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