Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
