Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
