She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
