I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
