Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
How external is "for external use only"?
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
