listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
How did I end up in the pool?!
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No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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