First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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