I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
