Sober January is a disaster.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
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Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
We left the knife in your bed.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
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I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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