You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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