I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I wish I only lived at night.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
