big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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