I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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