tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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