The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Naked. naked and bneed help.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
