Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
she told me i tasted like america
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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