so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
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