I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
