The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
