I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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