It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
