I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
