If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
