is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
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