its not stalking. its research.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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