It's like a parade of train wrecks.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
