Christians are straight up FREAKS
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
