just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
