Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize