I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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